Share Your Funny Condom Stories

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Even in the enlightened days of the 21st century, talking about condoms can still be a little taboo.  That’s a shame because they really are so very important for our sexual health.  Perhaps that’s why Durex encouraged people to share their funny condom moments with the world, to make it more acceptable to talk about condoms and so that we all realise we are not the only ones who might have had an awkward or embarrassing moment.  Joking aside, sharing our condom tales could be a lifesaver, literally!

Perhaps, not surprisingly, women talk about sex much more openly than men which neatly leads on to the first tall tale and that is the story of the missing condom.  How many women has this happened to?  So the encounter has finished only for you both to realise the condom is absent.  After a bit of rummaging around in the sheets and the duvet, you realise that it hasn’t yet left the building so to speak.  What should you do in the event that a condom remains inside the female?

You have two options, you can either try and retrieve it yourself, or you can go to the doctor and ask them to do it.  The main problem is removing it intact and with its contents still in situ ideally.  It’s a matter of judgement whether you think this is something you can do at the time or you feel you may need a little help with.  Check the condom is present in its entirety so there are no pieces missing.  Even if it is intact and looks like it hasn’t split or torn, you should still get yourself checked for STIs and unwanted pregnancy because you will be at risk.  Always ensure you are using condoms that are the right size, they should feel snug and tight.  A condom that is too large will probably come off.

Many other hilarious stories concern purchasing condoms particularly amongst adolescents who can suffer from terrible embarrassment.  The worst is bumping into someone you know just as you about to make that purchase.  Or heading to a chemist where the condoms are kept tucked away behind the counter and you have to ask.  At least now with self-service tills in supermarkets, your purchase can be pretty discrete.

Anything that makes us laugh about condoms is a good thing as they need to be openly talked about and discussed.  But just remember, when it comes down to the nitty-gritty, condoms are deadly serious if you want to avoid STIs and unplanned pregnancies.

To keep the coffee going – here are condom traditions from around the world!

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Stuart Brown

Stuart Brown

I'm Stuart, senior Editor at British Condoms. I am an expert in all areas of sexual health and have a passion to drive knowledge to youth in the UK. Any questions for me or media enquiries, please feel free to tweet me @britishcondoms. Always open to engagement.

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